The two-week break afforded to us by the good folks of Sons Of Anarchy left us with a warm and fuzzy feeling as everything fell right for Jax and the club. However, “You Are My Sunshine” (Tara sings it, Juice has “Sonshine” tatted on his chest) destroyed all that goodwill. I am actually afraid for next week’s finale, because it is going to be brutal on a bunch of different levels. Let’s go….
-The DA wasn’t buying Jax’s explanation of the Clay/Galen deaths at all, but he was right, he DID actually give her what she wanted. And there would have been a lot more dead cops if he hadn’t planned that diversion. Tig got jokes, though. He and the Hispanic dude were going back and forth as they killed those Irish at the gun drop, and that was pretty good. That “not the hair” joint was pretty good. So dry.
-Meanwhile, Tara is plotting to meet the DA at the hospital and give her the bullet that she got out of Bobby’s shoulder so she could get immunity for her and her boys. How does she plan to shake her SAMCRO escort? She doesn’t, really. At this point, Tara isn’t worried about the prospects following her, because they’re not that smart.
-Abel speaks for the first time in what, two seasons? I forgot that kid had a voice. But that “where is Mommy?” was strong as shit. That basically punched Gemma in the stomach. These kids are so damned doomed.
-The Chinese leader has a hard-on for revenge for the Irish killing his men, and he isn’t satisfied when he finds the guys that Tig and company killed already dead. He wants Connor, and now Jax has to come up with another plan because they won’t release Happy until he gets vengeance. I can’t help but think that Kurt Sutter and crew were partyin’ and making old samurai “you killed my brother” jokes while they were writing this episode.
-Nero has a chat with his #2 in his crew, who basically tells him that the crew is getting restless and that SAMCRO has been nothing but trouble. The Mayans want to meet him and form an alliance for when the shit hits the fan. Someone has to talk sense into this dude. Such a sucker for love, and I’m all for love and shit, but would you sit through all this shit the club has put you through? You damn near went to jail for a murder you didn’t commit. But anyway, we’ll get back to that.
-You’d love to feel bad for Gemma, and the show has gone through a lot to make you sympathize with her, but then you get her next scene with Wendy. She is throwing around the “Uncle Cancer” jokes and calling Wendy a junkie mom, all of which are true, but don’t be a bitch about it. She might be the worst character on the show in terms of morals and shit.
-Bobby tells Juice to take some Oxy and go visit the whores. Yeah, that’s gon’ work out well for everyone.
-Nero meets Alvarez, the leader of the Mayans, who hits with one of two nominees for the line of the episode: “Ain’t no Switzerland in the ‘hood”. SAMCRO is getting out of guns, which means the Mayans lose that backing and will likely get run over. You can’t be neutral in this shit.
-You just knew that Gemma, Tara and the DA would all end up at the hospital at the same damn time. Gemma needed painkillers for Bobby, which Tara said she’d get, and the DA did some quick thinking to come up with the “visiting injured cops” story. That little scene between Gemma and the DA was good. Both knew the other was hiding something, they just couldn’t figure out what. Then the DA and her lawyer meet with Tara, and I’m surprised her lawyer wasn’t there. That makes me kinda wonder. But then she goes back to the cabin, and Jax is there, and she grabbed him to give him a hug and say, “I’m sorry”. Mixed signals like a mufucka.
-Juice takes Bobby’s advice and heads over to the brothel, but he’s wacked like shit on Oxycontin and damn near has a panic attack. Then he proceeds to OD with a hooker and Gemma and Nero have to save him, with Gemma sticking her fingers down his throat to make him throw up the drugs. Just let Juice die, man. Him being alive isn’t good for anyone. This was even before he spilled his guts (not literally) to Nero about Jax making him kill the mother of the boy who shot up the school. Juice isn’t built for this life anymore.
-So everyone meets at the guns, where Jax turns Connor over to the Chinese, but who didn’t know it would get messy when the Chinese opened up the back of the truck? Marks and his gang join the party and as per usual, dead bodies everywhere. Connor and Marks meet, Marks gives him a half-million for the first shipment and Connor is like, “hey, maybe the negroes are alright”. And shoutout to the boys for letting Happy kill the Chinese leader. Happy stay winnin’, dogg.
-Second nominee for line of the episode, and I think it wins: the president of the Niners says to Jax, “see you soon” and Jax was like, “no, you won’t”. The Niners dude looks at him, smiles and was like, “who you kiddin'”? I actually laughed out loud. Poor Jax. Thinks he can just walk away from this shit.
-And Tig STILL gets to survive, for fuck sakes.
-Tara pulls off her great plan: she tells Gemma she needs her at the cabin with Bobby, then goes to Gemma to get her boys, sticking up Wendy and Unser in the process. Unser puts together that she could possibly be working with the feds. Wendy yells some shit about being Abel’s real mother and gets punched in the mouth for her troubles. I don’t know how far Tara thought she was going to get. I think it actually hits her when Abel asked if Daddy would be joining them on the road. That “You Are My Sunshine” she was singing came to a halt right quick.
-Shit ends with Jax meeting Gemma at his house, and he starts throwing shit around one of the kids’ rooms. Nero came over and it looked like he wanted to confront Jax about what Juice told him, but he decided it wasn’t the time or place, and he got all fatherly. Wasn’t that nice? Get that shit outta here. They have been through a lot, but that seemed kinda forced.
Season finale, next week. My “Tara dies” agenda is firmly in play. Now, it’s just a matter of who gets to do it: Jax, Gemma, or the sheriffs that the DA has looking for her. Sons Of Anarchy, you absurd, yet great, show.