Well, this seemed to get a good response for our first Big Brother Canada 2 recap, so now, Holly and I are taking it up a notch: live blogging. We’re aiming to do it on Wednesday night because of a three-hour time difference and, well, mufuckas gotta work in the morning. We’ll try and drop a recap joint at some point after the eviction on Thursday. Let’s go…….
[9:02:30 PM] Holly: Welcome to No-Pants live blogging of Big Brother Canada!
[9:02:46 PM] Neil: Wooooooooo!
[9:03:02 PM] Neil: I forgot about Arlie getting all creepy
[9:03:12 PM] Holly: You have beer I assume?
[9:03:28 PM] Neil: I have been saving my last one all day for this
[9:03:52 PM] Holly: Drinking game alert! Drink every time Sabrina cries
[9:04:09 PM] Neil: I will need far more beer for that
[9:04:38 PM] Holly: LOL at Neda trying to look surprised that Andrew and Sabrina are nominated and she’s safe
[9:05:10 PM] Neil: Why Neda outchea lookin’ like Zoe from American Horror Story?
[9:05:25 PM] Holly: She does! I never thought of that
[9:05:32 PM] Neil: Wide ass brim
[9:05:39 PM] Holly: That has been a look lately. I’m not down with it
[9:05:42 PM] Neil: DRINK
[9:05:58 PM] Neil: I heard tears, I can only assume it was Sabrina
[9:06:01 PM] Holly: Hahah yes!
[9:06:48 PM] Holly: Why does Canada not like the first five? Because Sabrina is a witch, Andrew and Kenny are jerks, and Arlie is the weirdest person I’ve ever seen
[9:06:52 PM] Holly: Aside from Adel
[9:07:14 PM] Neil: You don’t like Adel?
[9:07:24 PM] Holly: Who just walks around singing the national anthem? Adel does
[9:07:56 PM] Neil: Why are they all dressed like witches or Mexican gangbangers from the 90s?
[9:08:05 PM] Neil: This is fucked
[9:08:11 PM] Neil: And i will give you that
[9:08:21 PM] Holly: Sarah’s eyebrows make her look like a chola
[9:08:25 PM] Neil: DOGG
[9:08:38 PM] Neil: I was tryna remember the word “chola” for her haha
[9:09:03 PM] Holly: Sarah, do not put your eggs in Arlies basket
[9:09:39 PM] Holly: IS THAT A HUGE JAR OF PICKLED EGGS????
[9:09:44 PM] Holly: Who the eff eats that?
[9:10:05 PM] Neil: People who hate Jesus, that’s who
[9:10:20 PM] Holly: HAHAHA Andrew is crying
[9:10:31 PM] Holly: So is Sabrina… drink!
[9:10:57 PM] Neil: Hahahaha
[9:11:07 PM] Neil: Nah
[9:11:13 PM] Neil: You’re perceived as an asshole
[9:11:15 PM] Neil: You’re right
[9:11:44 PM] Holly: I don’t understand these people. Canada just sent you a clear message that you are playing a dirty game. Change your game plan
[9:11:55 PM] Neil: Sabrina is out of control
[9:12:06 PM] Neil: Awwwwwwwwwwwwww muffin
[9:12:09 PM] Neil: He wants to go home
[9:12:58 PM] Holly: Then he doesn’t deserve to be there. He has been walking around saying he won’t campaign against Sabrina. Why not? Don’t you want to stay and win?
[9:13:16 PM] Holly: This is the downfall of Canadians sometimes. They are too nice.
[9:13:34 PM] Neil: And the worst part of it is that he wouldn’t even have to campaign that hard
[9:14:02 PM] Holly: She’s the easiest to vote out.
[9:15:05 PM] Neil: By a mile
[9:15:44 PM] Holly: Jon looks like a poor man’s version of Ryan Gosling
[9:16:21 PM] Neil: And Heather is a bootleg Heather Graham
[9:16:35 PM] Holly: YUP
[9:17:01 PM] Holly: Getting a ticket for farting or burping? We would end up in Big Brother jail within the hour
[9:17:23 PM] Neil: Wouldn’t even make it to introducing myself
[9:17:34 PM] Neil: You can’t tug on your junk?
[9:17:42 PM] Neil: I DON’T WANT TO LIVE IN THIS WORLD
[9:18:37 PM] Holly: Um
[9:18:55 PM] Holly: Naked Arlie is not what’s hot in the streets
[9:19:23 PM] Neil: What in all of the fucks?
[9:19:48 PM] Holly: I can’t hate on the nose picking
[9:20:05 PM] Neil: Good grief
[9:20:15 PM] Neil: I’m all for a quick brush
[9:20:29 PM] Neil: Son got TWO hands up in this bitch
[9:21:05 PM] Holly: What is up with all the national anthem stuff?
[9:21:10 PM] Holly: Enough!
[9:22:19 PM] Neil: Gotta make sure mufuckas know, I guess
[9:24:47 PM] Holly: The Canadian flags everywhere aren’t enough I guess
[9:25:43 PM] Neil: I am still stuck on the nose picking
[9:25:48 PM] Neil: Like
[9:25:50 PM] Neil: Yeesh
[9:26:26 PM] Holly: Oh dude
[9:26:35 PM] Neil: Crotch grabbing is as Canadian as Olympic hockey and beavertails
[9:26:37 PM] Holly: If you knew how much I picked my nose, we may not be friends
[9:27:14 PM] Neil: I am wearing gloves the next time I see you
[9:27:26 PM] Holly: I will wipe my boogies right on your sleeve
[9:27:36 PM] Holly: Oh Heather gets houseguest choice
[9:27:57 PM] Neil: I need her to be a pawn at some point
[9:28:00 PM] Neil: This week
[9:28:03 PM] Neil: Because, Heather
[9:28:21 PM] Holly: Hahaha, that’s an awesome group of players though. Not one of them will use the veto on Sabrina or Andrew
[9:28:30 PM] Holly: She was a pawn two weeks in a row
[9:28:44 PM] Neil: I want every week, it is just Heather and someone else
[9:28:49 PM] Neil: She just sleeps in the chair
[9:29:01 PM] Holly: OK WAIT
[9:29:21 PM] Holly: Andrew is upset that Canada doesn’t like him, and then right after calls Heathera dumb bitch?
[9:29:24 PM] Holly: Whut?
[9:30:02 PM] Neil: Just spectacular
[9:30:09 PM] Neil: Irony or stupidity?
[9:30:14 PM] Neil: Ironic stupidity?
[9:30:29 PM] Holly: Wow, what a complete jerk
[9:30:54 PM] Holly: Confront her, be rude to her, all because she’s not on his side?
[9:32:07 PM] Neil: Why would she even use it on him?
[9:32:18 PM] Neil: The fuck has he ever done for her?
[9:32:56 PM] Holly: I’m impressed with her though, for as ditzy and airy as she is, she held her own and didn’t get personal or emotional
[9:33:32 PM] Holly: She might be the underdog in this, she may have what it takes to go far
[9:33:44 PM] Neil: She is kinda reminding me of
[9:33:47 PM] Neil: Um
[9:33:55 PM] Neil: Blond girl from the American joint
[9:34:01 PM] Neil: Jordan???
[9:35:20 PM] Neil: See, now I don’t care who goes
[9:35:25 PM] Neil: One of these mufuckas gotta go
[9:36:31 PM] Holly: That dated Jeff?
[9:36:42 PM] Neil: That’s it
[9:36:44 PM] Holly: Yeah. a little
[9:37:05 PM] Holly: Sabrina used to be a flight attendant. Imagine being on her plane?
[9:38:50 PM] Neil: That would be awful
[9:38:51 PM] Holly: SIDE NOTE: I accidently bought plenty o’ pulp orange juice. Worst mistake ever
[9:39:10 PM] Holly: This veto comp is boring
[9:39:30 PM] Holly: Too much math
[9:40:26 PM] Neil: Agreed, but I gotta admit, they are swinging for the fences this year, at least trying new things
[9:40:33 PM] Holly: OMG I don’t even understand these questions!
[9:40:46 PM] Holly: And I work with numbers for a living
[9:41:28 PM] Holly: I can’t wait to see Sabrina struggle with this
[9:41:32 PM] Holly: Or Heather
[9:41:59 PM] Neil: Watch Heather fuck around and be a math wiz
[9:42:33 PM] Holly: Oh my god, Adel, Heather and Neda threw it!
[9:42:45 PM] Holly: That’s not good
[9:43:23 PM] Neil: This isn’t looking good at ALL
[9:43:59 PM] Holly: She’s crying!
[9:44:00 PM] Holly: DRINK
[9:44:25 PM] Neil: As I drink
[9:44:40 PM] Neil: I’m becoming more of a Heather fan
[9:44:41 PM] Holly: Andrew knows math like I know sports
[9:44:45 PM] Holly: Mark my words
[9:44:46 PM] Neil: She’s like Beth from the Walking Dead
[9:45:26 PM] Holly: Yeah, I am disliking her less
[9:46:25 PM] Holly: Cliff hanger!
[9:48:51 PM] Neil: Shit is stressful, bruh
[9:51:04 PM] Neil: Woooooooooooooooooo
[9:51:12 PM] Holly: Oh, here come the lovers’ waterworks
[9:51:27 PM] Holly: What do you think will happen with Allison if Andrew leaves?
[9:51:53 PM] Neil: If she is smart, she’ll align herself with Kenny
[9:52:06 PM] Neil: But I’m not sure how smart she is
[9:52:47 PM] Holly: Sabrina is crying again, drink
[9:53:08 PM] Holly: Allison hasn’t made any other connections in the house, she could be screwed
[9:53:08 PM] Neil: Okay, next week, i am buying a six pack for this
[9:53:31 PM] Holly: Wayament
[9:53:50 PM] Holly: Andrew thinks Sabrina should be there more than him? You should never think anyone should be there more than you
[9:53:55 PM] Holly: Why are you even on the show???
[9:54:07 PM] Holly: Holy shit, everyone is friggin crying
[9:54:21 PM] Holly: Chug the rest of your beer
[9:54:38 PM] Neil: Hahaha I finished it already
[9:54:54 PM] Holly: Of course you did
[9:55:13 PM] Neil: Allison is going to do something stupid
[9:55:17 PM] Neil: I can see it coming
[9:55:51 PM] Holly: She’s definitely a wild card
[9:56:25 PM] Holly: Canada voted her in, she has to see that Canada doesn’t like the alliance Andrew has, therefore Allison should make a new alliance
[9:56:52 PM] Neil: Replace andrew in the first five
[9:57:11 PM] Neil: Nah, that would be stupid
[9:57:18 PM] Neil: Go with Heather and ‘em?
[9:57:26 PM] Holly: She’ll probably team up with Sabrina
[9:58:28 PM] Neil: This cryfest is fucking awful
[9:58:37 PM] Neil: Mufucka ain’t dying
[9:58:38 PM] Neil: Good grief
[9:58:55 PM] Neil: And Sabrina, in her head is like, ummmmmm……okay?
[9:59:54 PM] Holly: Rachelle was on that episode for two seconds
[10:00:44 PM] Neil: Oh and I love how Jon was like, “THIS IS WHAT CANADA WANTS!!!!!”
[10:01:18 PM] Neil: No blood on my hands
[10:01:30 PM] Holly: Well, this episode was lackluster. But this tweet from Peter has me excited for the sideshow tomorrow
[10:01:31 PM] Holly:
Peter Brown @alsopeterbrown 5m
Trust me Andre2, I won’t feel bad for you… Looking forward to a little chat tomorrow on #BBCANSS!
[10:01:50 PM] Neil: Okay, I’m confused by the whole sideshow thing
[10:01:59 PM] Holly: It is mirrored after Bit on the Side, the aftershow to BB UK
[10:02:47 PM] Holly: So right after the eviction show, Peter and Gary host an hour-long show where they discuss what happened, talk to the booted houseguest and show some behind-the-scenes stuff
[10:02:58 PM] Neil: Aight
[10:03:08 PM] Neil: I will watch that if Andrew gets evicted
[10:03:15 PM] Neil: Which I think will happen
[10:04:10 PM] Neil: Sabrina probably should because she is a better game-player than Andrew, who will eventually cut his own throat anyway, but they only see what is right in front of them
[10:05:10 PM] Neil: And Andrew has been a dick
[10:05:19 PM] Holly: I think Andrew has spent most of his time today and yesterday trying to convince the house to keep Sabrina. So I think he will go
[10:05:32 PM] Holly: Heather will definitely vote him, and so will Adel
[10:05:47 PM] Neil: Neda and Jon as well
[10:05:53 PM] Neil: Arlie
[10:06:01 PM] Neil: If he really wants to flex
[10:06:30 PM] Neil: Only votes Andrew has for sure is Allison and probably Kenny
[10:06:38 PM] Neil: The rest will likely throw him in the bushes
[10:06:54 PM] Holly: Yep
[10:07:07 PM] Holly: Well it’s been a slice, but I have to head to bed
[10:07:22 PM] Holly: Get it? SLICE
[10:07:35 PM] Neil: I was tryna find that rimshot
[10:07:44 PM] Holly: Booyah
[10:07:47 PM] Neil: Hahaha
[10:07:52 PM] Neil: Holla tomorrow