The Walking Dead S05E04 – Slabtown

So, The Walking Dead was finally gon’ tell us what happened to Beth. “Slabtown” had a excellent shot to be a very good episode because even though a lot of people don’t like the Beth character, we still wanted to know who took her in that car last season. The result was an extremely uneven episode of The Walking Dead that rescued itself from being complete asscheeks with the final third. Let’s go….

-Beth wakes up in a hospital in downtown Atlanta, which we haven’t seen in a long time, and she yells for help. She has a cast on her arm and stitches in her cheek, and she is greeted by a doctor and a cop, who are Steven and Dawn, respectively. Dawn says that they found her alone in the woods and that she owes them, and owing someone in The Walking Dead world is never good. And the internet tells me that the outbreak started about 520 days ago; I don’t know much about generators, but they’re powering at least some of a big-ass hospital. Just one of about 937 questions I wrote down for this episode.

-Also, if I see the hashtag “Bethisode” one more time, I might bite someone in the neck.

-Steven is the only doctor in the place and Beth joins him as he does his rounds, because they are short on nurses, apparently. One man just isn’t going to make it and Steven pulls the plug on the life support machine, then stabs him through the brain so he won’t turn. They then take the dead man to the elevator shaft and throw him down to the walkers that are in the basement of the hospital. I suppose the bodies have to go somewhere and it keeps the walkers as content as a zombie can be.

-Beth goes to grab some food and she runs into a cop named Gorman, who says he is the one that saved her and that she should show some gratitude. This dude is creepy right off the break. Something ain’t right with these cops, b.

-She takes food to Steven, who is listening to old blues records, which seems like such a waste of power, and I love music as much as anyone I know. My question here is, what are they eating and where are they getting green peppers?

-A new patient is brought in and Steven says he can’t be saved, but Dawn is dead-set on getting his man some help, so Steven obliges. The other cop whispered something to her, so that is something to keep an eye on. Then she slapped Beth for no good reason whatsoever, and I won’t front, I laughed a bit because I think we all have wanted to slap Beth at some point.

-Steven stitches Beth back up and she goes to put on a new shirt, in which she finds a lollipop. As she is walking around, she wanders into a room where the doctor and Dawn are trying to amputate a woman’s arm. This woman is named Joan and she has been bitten, but she tried to escape. Something gotta be wrong with this place if you’re tryna leave; this is the best place we’ve seen in The Walking Dead. Beth is made to help hold Joan down while her arm is sawed off. Yeesh. What good is she to them if she has been bitten and now has a nubby arm? I’m calling this “The Season of Nubs”.

-Beth finds Noah, who is in charge of the laundry and left the lollipop for her. He says that this group tends to save the weak so they can basically make them into slaves, and that he is from Virginia. How the hell did he end up even close to Atlanta? Anyway, he says he is out as soon as he can and Beth is down for the cause.

-Beth is brought food by Dawn, who says she has to be strong to be able to work off her debt. Beth said she is leaving as soon as she can and Dawn tries to change her mind, saying that they will have to rebuild when all this is over. Dawn seems like she is tryna convince herself more than Beth, who isn’t buying her shit. Then Beth is mopping blood in Joan’s room, and she all but says she has been a toy for Gorman and the rest of the male cops. Beth is smarter than she looks; she is putting all this together.

-Speaking of Gorman, he walks into Beth’s room as she is looking for her lollipop, which he has in his mouth and forces her to put it in hers, so that confirms that: this mufucka is a creep of the highest order. Steven enters before it can go any further and confronts Gorman, and then Dawn comes in, but Gorman whispers to the doctor that Dawn won’t always be in charge. Someone gotta kill this dude, b

-Beth asks Steven why he is still there and he takes her to the ground floor of the hospital and bangs on some metal shutters, and a gang of walkers come up to it, so that answers that question. They go to the roof, which features a sad little garden (which is where the peppers came from, I assume) and he tells the story of how this all came to be. Basically, he traded his service for a place when the outbreak started, but the person before Dawn, named Hanson, didn’t do a good job. I kinda blacked out during this scene, so I watched it again and it still made no sense. It is basically a microcosm of this episode: decent idea, should be important, but executed poorly.

-Steven tells Beth to give the man that was brought in earlier some Clozapine, but he starts to have a seizure and dies. Dawn is livid and asks what happened, and Noah takes the blame because he knows he is about to get that work. Beth hears the beating and tries to help, but Steven holds her back. He also asks her if she gave him Clonazepam, and Beth is like, nah, b, the other one and now she is like, is this mufucka tryna confuse me?

-Around this point in the episode, I apparently wrote, “This better not last more than one episode, fuck all these people”. I don’t think I was the only one thinking this.

-Dawn tells Beth that she knows Noah is lying and tells her that she isn’t a part of the greater good, which is a major theme in The Walking Dead. Everyone, from Rick or Carol, to the Governor to Gareth, thinks they are doing what is best for the group they are in, they just have messed-up ways of going about things. Also, Dawn tells Beth that the happier her cops are, the better they will work. Basically, let them run trains on you for the greater good. This goes back to Joan, who said earlier that Dawn couldn’t control them and the line of the episode, “I guess it’s easier to make a deal with the devil when you’re not the one paying the price”.

-Noah tells Beth he is alright and that man meant something to Dawn, but he is getting out and he has a plan that involves Beth stealing keys for the elevator. Beth takes her sweet-ass time doing so, but she also finds Joan on the floor in Dawn’s office as she bled out and wrote “Fuck you” on said floor. Joan was the best part of this episode…but she ain’t done.

-Gorman finds Beth in the office and is like, if you let me fuck, no one has to find out you were sneaking. Beth sees Joan starting to turn and is like, cool, but as Gorman is distracted, she his him over the head to knock him to the ground and Joan gets to partyin’ on his neck like the lunchtime buffet at Mandarin (Toronto people know what I mean). Beth is also smart enough to take his gun, which gets her a couple points.

-Beth sends Dawn to her office to give her and Noah time to escape. They go to the elevator shaft and Noah starts to lower Beth; pay no attention to the fact that they’re probably Walmart cloths that definitely wouldn’t hold a person. Beth gets down, but Noah falls onto a pile of bodies and she jumps down after him. Noah is limping and he has already avoided a walker that opened the elevator shaft, which is why he fell. The two managed to fight off a buncha zombies in the dark and get outside, where there are more walkers. They fight those off as well, but Noah manages to get through a fence while Beth is tackled by a cop.

-They walk out past, like, five cars with crosses on the window and again, all I want to know is where all this magical gas is coming from. I am all about letting shit slide in The Walking Dead, but this REALLY bothers me for some reason. And how far is downtown Atlanta from where Terminus was, and the church where the rest are? I need to find a map of this shit.

-Dawn tries to talk shit to Beth, who loses it and tells Dawn that no one is coming to save them and she has let a buncha awful shit happen for no reason. At this point, I am not even sure Dawn is a cop, she just found a uniform and was like, cool. Again, she slaps the shit outta Beth and knocks her out, after which we see Beth getting more stitches from Steven.

-Beth then confronts Steven with the accusation that he told her to give that man, named Trevitt, the wrong medication on purpose. He fesses up and says he knew Trevitt from before and he was also a doctor; had he kept him alive, there would be no use for Steven and Lord knows what would have happened to him. He has a point. It wasn’t right, but he has a point, I ain’t mad.

-Beth was, though, and was about to run up on Steven with some scissors, but a new patient was being rolled in: KILLA CAROL! Beth is like, OH SHIT, and the episode ends.

I won’t lie, I think this was the worst episode of the season so far for The Walking Dead, and I am pretty sure that a lot of others will think so. A lot of gripes are legitimate, but I also think that some of it has to do with the fact that, well, we don’t like Beth. She has her moments, but I guarantee that 90% of TWD fans wouldn’t care if she died at the end of “Slabtown”. That being said, I wanna see how Carol reacts to seeing her, and how the two try to escape because you know that is happening. I also think that it is Noah that was behind Daryl back at the church, but I don’t even know if we see them next week because it looks like the Abraham group is the focus. This is a very important moment for the fifth season of The Walking Dead; they have to be careful of spreading themselves too thin, which they have done before. As for “Slabtown”, the first 40-45 minutes were underwhelming to downright awful, but the final 15-20 minutes did enough for me to keep it from being a total failure.

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