As I have said before, The Walking Dead is a show built on bad decisions. Hell, if they were making good decisions, the show probably would have lasted a solid season and a half. But with “East”, the penultimate episode of Season 6, they might have set a new bar. Let’s go…..
-The episode starts with a montage with a female voice saying “I see you” and a bullethole in a windshield, then she says to “come out slowly” as we see the car has a flat tire. There is dripping blood, and a dude saying that “he’s going to pass on that”…a spear with blood on it, then Carol’s rosary beads on the ground, a man yelling and then a gunshot. Pretty ominous, and not subtle that shit is about to hit the fan. Subtlety has never been a strong suit of The Walking Dead.
-Carol is sewing a jacket or something, looking fed up, then she looks around and then starts packing a bag with food, so she is getting outta here. Tobin comes in the room and she throws the backpack under the bed, and he starts talking about Denise, but Carol ain’t listening at all. Me neither, Killa, me neither. She looks like she is either gon’ cry and put him in an arm triangle.
-Next is another montage, because who doesn’t love montages, and this one is set to Johnny Cash’s “It’s All Over” (shoutout to Tunefind), which is perfect for this scene. Tobin is sleeping as Carol dips out, Carl grabs a gun and stares at it, and it has something engraved on it…I even paused on it and I still don’t know what it says….I think there is a “D” in there, and he takes the gun. Maggie and Glenn are showering, and Glenn notices some bruises on her, probably from her scuffle with Alicia Witt and her shitty band of miscreants because again, taking pregnant women out on MURDERDEATHKILL missions is always something you need to do. Daryl is on his motorcycle with the “Dennis” keychain that Denise found before she got an arrow in the eye, and he looks like he’s about to do something stupid. But then we have, for me, the best part of the montage. Sasha gives Abe a cigar as they’re switching guard posts, and they’re all smiling and happy, and then Sasha catches Rosita’s eye…..ooooooooooooooooooooooh. That look Rosita gives her is so good. It’s part sadness, part “bitch I’ma fight you at some point”, and Sasha almost looks at her like, “yeah, I know it’s coming”.
-Michonne and Rick are in bed, eating an apple loudly, and I forgot this was a thing. Michonne has to get up and help Maggie, who is worried about an attack, but Rick is like, nah, we got this, which means they absolutely don’t got this and something fucked up is about to happen. Then we get to Michonne outside with Maggie and Glenn, and they’re telling her that ain’t shit gon’ happen, when they see Daryl opening the gate and leaving on his bike, so of course, they have to follow him: Glenn, Michonne and Rosita head out, and Rosita knows where he is going, she says. Then, Tobin takes Carol’s goodbye note to Rick, who leaves with Morgan of all people to go find her. Great, so we have six people gone from the group, all of whom are good-to-great fighters. If the Saviors are watching Alexandria, they’re laughing like, yo, we ain’t even have to do anything.And the best part of Carol’s note is when it says, don’t try to find me…..does she know who the hell she is talking to? Yeesh.
-Carol is driving down the road in her car with spikes coming out of it, because that’s not going to draw attention. A truck drives past her, and they shoot the tires out. They demand that she gets out of the car, and then they find out where she is coming from, which they know because they’ve seen cars with spikes out of them at Alexandria. Carol is like, man, just go away and no one needs to get hurt; basically, don’t bring the Killa out. She’s basically Bruce Banner and the Hulk at this point. When they don’t do what she says, Carol sprays them with a gun in her coat sleeve, which is what she was sewing at the beginning of the episode. There is one Savior left, or so it seems, and that is what we see during the pre-credit scene: he charges at her, there is a gunshot and that is it. The blood we see is his as she shoots him, but did he get her with his knife? MYSTERY.
-Maggie tries to get some food before her guard shift, but Enid says she’ll do it so Maggie can rest. Does Maggie not know she is pregnant? I get she wants to help, but come on, bruh.
-Morgan and Rick are driving east, which they deduced from tire tracks. Rick says that Morgan doesn’t know Carol and he doesn’t know why he is doing this, and Morgan is like, nah, we got to know each other a bit, and then he speaks in vague cliches about right and wrong and it’s getting really annoying. They get to the shootout site, where there is another Savior, but he hides while Rick and Morgan survey the scene. They see a blood trail, which they deduce is Carol’s and they start following, while the Savior comes out of the woods, grabs Carol’s beads and starts following them. Oh, Rick and Morgan killed the Savior that rushed Carol. I think that was him.
-Rosita, Michonne and Glenn to get to where Denise was killed, and they find Daryl’s bike hidden, so Rosita was right as Daryl came back to find Dwight and kill him. This seems like such a terrible idea. Glenn and Michonne want to bring him back, but Rosita thinks they should let him do what he has to do. So they track him easily enough; example #1 of Daryl being a bad tracker. But that’s just the tip of the goddamn iceberg and yeah, he shoots an arrow close enough to them to know that he knows they’re there; I don’t care. They want him to come home, but Daryl tells them that he should have killed Dwight back in “Always Accountable” (which I apparently skipped in these recaps because I think I was on holiday), and Denise would still be alive. I don’t know about that because Denise was pretty stupid and probably would have gotten herself killed anyway, but it wouldn’t have been by Dwight. So yeah, you gotta kill everyone in this world. Anyway, he leaves, Rosita is like, he’s right and goes with him, leaving Glenn and Michonne there like, the fuck just happened? But of course, Dwight and ’em come outta nowhere and surround them; example #2 of Daryl’s tracking abilities. Also, his shitty soliloquy gave the Saviors time to come up with their “surround” plan. Yeah, this all Daryl’s fault.
-Rick and Morgan continue their back-and-forth about life being precious and shit, and Morgan remembers that they threw Carol in the bushes after she killed those people at the prison, and what would happen now; Rick says they would thank her, and Morgan is like, you see what happens when you give people another chance? But that’s different, bruh; that’s Carol, not some mufucka with a W in his forehead THAT TELLS YOU, POINT BLANK, HE’S GON’ COME BACK AND KILL YOU. Why is this so hard for him to understand? Rick is like, I’ll deal with that later as they approach a farmhouse, and they see a walker that kinda looks like Carol, but it isn’t. They reach the farmhouse and there is a dude there, and he says he is looking for his horse, and Rick is like, we’re looking for our friend. The dude peaces out, but a buncha walkers emerge and that allows him to run while Rick and Morgan fight them off. Rick thinks dude is a Savior and Morgan is like, we don’t know that….really, who cares. He also tells Rick that he had that dude in the basement, and Carol knew about it, but that Wolf saved Denise, who then saved Carl in the most roundabout fucking argument I’ve ever heard. He ain’t know that dude threatened Denise on a damn-near minutely basis and if Denise would have died, he wouldn’t have cared. Man. Fuck Morgan, b. Anyway, he tells Rick that he should go back and he’ll go after Carol, and Rick gives him a gun and he doesn’t wanna take it, but Rick is like, don’t be stupid. Rick also tells Morgan that Michonne did steal the protein bar from the premiere, “First Time Again“. Morgan is like, mufucka, I know and they laugh. I forgot about that.
-Rick gets back to Alexandria, and everyone is still gone, and the two share a moment about being afraid to get close to anyone again. Fair, but yo…..we ain’t got time for this sappy shit right now.
-Maggie gets Enid to cut her hair short, like, Carol’s length, and Maggie says she has to keep going, so I guess she needs a change. But just then, she starts screaming in pain and doubles over, and Enid starts freaking out. Maggie better not lose this baby. Sure wish there was something close to a doctor left, but oh wait, she decides to try and play warrior last week.
-Daryl and Rosita are sneaking around and they see Glenn and Michonne tied up, and he tells them to be quiet, but Glenn is obviously tryna warn him and oh wouldn’t you fucking know it, there is Dwight, behind Daryl with a gun. He pulls the trigger and says “he’ll be alright” as there is a buncha blood splatter and the episode ends. The final example of Daryl being a terrible tracker. There have been other examples in past episodes, too. He was good in the early seasons, but he is just awful in the last few. And honestly, he hope he is dead, but I’m prepared for him to be alive because after the Glenn thing, you won’t fool me again. He should be dead and Carol should be dead, and it hurts my soul to say it, but they should be and I hope they are.
-Oh yeah, before I wrap this up: Flight 462 had their 15th episode, and the pieces are finally coming together. The glass broke and the plane is going down and as they’re going through people putting on their masks, you get a quick look at a flight attendant and she doesn’t look good at all. So they’re gon’ crash in the ocean, which is where all the zombies come from in the trailer for the second season of Fear The Walking Dead (which I’m not sure if I’ma write about this season because life is busy and Game Of Thrones takes precedence….maybe I’ll break it up in five-episode recaps). That’s my guess. The last clip will air during next week’s finale.
So what do I think will happen next week? I think we should finally see Negan, who is going to kill someone. I guess if I had to rank them, I’d say Daryl is most likely, followed by Carol, Michonne and Glenn. Someone gotta die, though. I’ll be pissed if that doesn’t happen. What is Carl planning to do with that gun? Will Morgan use the gun that Rick gave him? Will the Saviors hit Alexandria now that they’re terribly outmanned? I’m not watching any trailers or anything, but I do know it’s 90 minutes. Let’s go, The Walking Dead. You’ve brought us this far with your ridiculousness. Don’t back off now.