Tag Archives: Gabriel

The Walking Dead S07E04 – Service

Now that we’re all caught up with everyone, and we know where everyone is, The Walking Dead continues with “Service”, also known as the Negan-comin-for-all-your-shit tour. Some stuff that happened in the premiere served to help this episode not be terrible, and there could have been a hint for the future here as well, so let’s go.

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-We open with Rick and Michonne in bed, which I kinda forgot about, and she sneaks out, well, she thinks she does. But Rick saw her the whole time, and I’m pretty sure he saw the rifle that she took out of the fireplace of their house. She takes her weapons and goes to an abandoned car, sitting on the roof, waiting for something it seems, while Rick picks up Judith from her crib. It is a very ominous feeling, this beginning, like Michonne is about to wild out, which might not be in her best interests.

-Meanwhile, Rosita and Spencer are going on a supply run so that they’ll have something to give the Saviors, but Eugene is gon’ build a portable audio system for them, because surely the Saviors need something to play their music on. I wonder what Negan listens to? He seems like he would listen to ’70s rock, with no use for anything modern. Watch, he’ll bring out a Katy Perry playlist and dare anyone to laugh.

-Negan shows up at the Alexandria gate with his crew, including Daryl, and he reminds me of Eddie Murphy doing his James Brown impersonation. He tells Rick to hold Lucille, knowing full and damn well that he ain’t gon’ do anything, and no one can talk to Daryl, either, but Daryl is basically beaten down at this point, just gearing up for his inevitable redemption. They start searching the houses, while Dwight fucks with Rosita, taking her hat and her water, and ordering her to go get Daryl’s motorcycle, so he can make his transformation complete. Damn, he’s gon’ be so mad when Daryl takes it back. He’ll probably die, too. Also in this sequence, when Negan rolled up to the gate, Spencer had no idea who he was and tried to backtalk Negan, and Rick was like, man, if you don’t open this damn gate before batting practice starts.

-Michonne sees a walker and tries to shoot it, but keeps missing, so she takes out her trusty katana and cuts his head in half. You would think that Michonne would be a better shooter than she is at this point, but hell, she has the katana, so just roll with that. Unless the opposition has guns. Then, you should probably work on that.

-Negan asks about Maggie, and Rick lies, saying she is dead. He takes Negan to her “grave”, where he says that he wanted to add her to his harem of wives. Yeah, good luck with that. Maggie would kill herself first, especially for him. I know she has a baby and all, but nah, that ain’t the life that she wants her kid to lead. But then they hear a gunshot and Rick looks at Negan like, YO IT WASN’T ME.

-They find Carl with a Savior at gunpoint because dude tried to take their medicine. While Negan is impressed with Carl’s, um, let’s say, testicular fortitude, he basically tells him to back off or more people die. Shoutout to Carl for having a bigger pair than his father, and the intelligence to know that Negan ain’t playin’. He also gets the guns taken away by Negan, who wants ALL of the guns and Rick said they’re all there, but apparently two are not counted for, so Negan threatens to kill Olivia if they’re not found. She works at the pantry and the armoury, so Rick can’t lose her. Might gotta put a job ad on Kijiji or some shit.

-Rosita and Spencer are out in the woods, and Spencer questions whether Rick should lead Alexandria. Well, if not him, Spencer, who? You? YOU? Better not be. Because if he was leading Alexandria after his mother died, there is a good chance there wouldn’t be an Alexandria at this point.

-Rick calls a meeting to see where these guns are, and tells everyone that Negan is running the show now. So, I assume he hasn’t told anyone about Negan until, like, just now. You should probably give your citizens a heads up before people come in and take your shit. That could have ended much worse for everyone, meaning Alexandria. Eugene noticed that there were a couple people not at the meeting, which will come up later, I’m sure.

-Rosita spends her time killing the undead Saviors that were there when Denise got her arrow in the eye, and kills them, while looking for guns on the correct assumption that Negan is taking theirs. So, where does she think she will hide these guns? She does hide one in the wheel-well of the car they were driving, but you can only put so many guns in wheel-wells.

-HEY, look, Father Bitchass makes his first appearance of the season and it was him who led Negan to Maggie’s “grave”. He says that faith will get them through this whole thing, and Rick needs to believe and all types of other shit. Unless faith carries a bazooka (which Negan took), they’ll need more than that. Rick does manage to find the guns, stashed in Spencer’s house, along with some booze and food, ol’ hoardin’-ass mufucka.

-Rick takes the guns to Negan, who continues to crack jokes while threatening lives, but Rick sees Michonne and asks to be excused. I have no idea how Negan doesn’t see her, and I don’t buy that Negan wouldn’t send someone over with Rick, most likely, himself. Rick goes over to her, while holding Lucille, and says that people will die if Negan doesn’t get the guns, so they make up some story about her hunting and she brings back a deer to make the story even better. I might have messed that last part up, because I spent most of the time rolling my eyes. He then asks if Daryl can stay and Negan is all NOAP. Negan even asks Daryl if he wants to stay, and Daryl says nothing. No matter what he said, he wouldn’t have been happy, knowing Negan. Dwight then rolls up on Daryl’s bike and says he can have it back if he just pleads his allegiance to Negan, but we all know that ain’t happening.

-Rick goes at Spencer for stealing the guns, and Spencer goes back at him, blaming him for the deaths of Glenn and Abe. Rick is like, I know I’m gettin’ punked out here, but it won’t be by you, I promise, and threatens to break Spencer’s jaw if he says some shit again. Everyone has a line, I suppose. Then, Rosita goes at Spencer, who tells her he doesn’t trust Rick, and this is where she sneaks out the wheel-well gun. I wouldn’t be super upset if Spencer died. I know he’s Deanna’s son and all, but you can only push people that do more than you for so long.

-Rick and Michonne are back at the house, spreading blankets on the floor because Negan even took their mattresses. Michonne is struggling to understand this new way of life, but then Rick tells her about Shane, and how he knows Judith probably isn’t his child, but this is life now and you roll with it. This is the first time he acknowledged that Judith probably wasn’t his, I believe, and that has gotta knaw at him. He also says that they don’t even have the numbers with the people at the Hilltop, who I forgot all about, and I think Rick even killed their best fighters, so that won’t help. I thought the Hilltop and the Kingdom were the same. But this is how I see this playing out: the Saviors will mention something about Alexandria at their next meeting with King Zeke and Morgan, who will then rally the troops to help save Rick and ’em. Yeah, that’s pretty much how that will go.

-Now, I didn’t see this part because my copy must have cut off, but Michonne sees the Saviors burning the mattresses and seethes, while Rosita takes a shell casing to Eugene and tells him to make her a bullet. Just one. Some magic-bullet shit that will take out all the Saviors. But I’m concerned about Michonne. She is on the verge of wildin’ the fuck out, and that scares me.

-Seriously, though: where the hell is Maggie? Did she end up at the Hilltop? Isn’t there a doctor there? Why the hell didn’t she go there in the first place? I know there is a story, I’m just not going back to look, but I do think there is a story.

So, this episode was all about Negan runnin’ Alexandria’s pockets, Rick getting down on himself like he did at the prison before he became a damn farmer, Michonne and Rosita should really get together and start coming up with a cohesive plan before they get everyone killed, and Judith might be an orphan. Hell, she might be a double orphan soon if Rick keeps giving Negan sideeyes (prediction: she won’t). I haven’t seen a preview for next week, but I would think the Kingdom would get a mention, and hell, maybe even the Hilltop, too. Because Lord knows, Rick is gon’ need a LOT of help to get past Negan and ’em.

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The Walking Dead S05E14 – Spend

Ever since the group got to Alexandria, The Walking Dead has been slowly integrating them into the new folks. Having parties, getting jobs, everything has been just wonderful. In “Spend”, that all gets tossed into a blender where Rick’s gun was supposed to be, set on fire and thrown off a cliff. Let’s go…..

-Father Bitchass hasn’t been around in a while, and I fear that the entire episode will be about him, so I’m already mad. He stares at a bowl of strawberries and a welcome note from some Rosemary person, and then starts ripping pages out of the Bible. Fuck are you so mad about? Your ass should still be on a rock in the woods surrounded by walkers. I bet he had the worst sermons and you know he stole from the collection plate.

-Noah meets with Deanna’s wife, Reg, the architect of the walls, and he wants to be an architect as well. Reg also writes everything down and Noah is intrigued, so Reg gives him his journal. Awwwww, Noah has a job. I’m not sure how much I trust him with tools and whatnot, but hey, gotta earn your keep somehow.

-Abe is up, washing his face and we see Rosa in the background, still in bed, so I guess that is actually a thing now. Man, shoutout to hot water. I’d still be showering.

-A run has to be made to pick up a part for the grid as they’re out of power, so there is a group consisting of Glenn, Aiden, his friend Nicholas, Tara, Noah and Eugene, whom Noah tries to give a gun to, but Eugene is like, nah, I’m not going, I’m a punk. But he ends up going anyway because he’s too much of a punk to stand up to Noah. Aiden says bye to his parents, Glenn says bye to Maggie, and Deanna thanks Glenn again for punching her son in the mouth. He should punch him again because whatever the hell they’re playing in the rave van as they’re driving away is awful. Meanwhile, Father Bitchass is skulking around outside the church.

-Jessie and Rick are in her garage, and her owl sculpture was smashed. She needs to just give up on that, it has been knocked over a couple times now, but as soon as I saw it, I just assumed it was her husband. Rick tells her about the broken-window theory, which is, if you keep the windows intact, society stays intact. Rick tryna be smart to get in her pants with this bullshit-ass theory. Go ‘head, bruh. Anyway, he says he’ll look into it.

-The run group get to the warehouse and Aiden wants to just run in all willy-nilly, but Glenn suggests checking the perimeter first in case shit goes down and they need an exit plan. Aiden says his plan is to run out the front because he has no idea how real it gets in these streets, and he hasn’t been on-screen that long, but they did a good job in casting this character. The actor’s name is Daniel Bonjour, he’s from South Africa and he is excellent at looking smug as hell.

-Eugene and Tara are walking together, and she tells him to pull his weight and he responds that he’s the one who got them to Washington. Uh, you were unconscious for the beginning of it and it spawned from a lie. Quite delusional of him and I want Tara to just kill him, right there.

-Noah and Glenn are scouting out the place and find a whole horde of walkers, where, at the front where Aiden was planning to run out. We don’t need to check the perimeter, he said. What a douche.

-They make it into the warehouse with Glenn leading, and Aiden is impressed with the way Glenn carries himself. They find a buncha walkers behind a fence and Aiden is shook as shit, you can see it in his eyes. Everyone splits off into pairs to find what they need, and the Eugene/Tara pair finds them first, while the Aiden/Nicholas pair get run up on by a walker in full body armor and he starts shooting it, but Glenn notices that it has explosives on it and tries to get Aiden to stop, to no avail. ZOMBIE BOMBS!

-Tara gets messed up by the zombie bomb, as does Aiden, who ends up impaled on a forklift. A walker runs up on Eugene, who is too scared to shoot it, and almost gets bit by another walker before Glenn and Noah saves him. Not gon’ lie, I was kinda rooting for the walkers there.

-Carol finds Sam, the kid she supposedly scared, downstairs in her pantry looking for more cookies. Carol is being as mean as possible to the kid, and he doesn’t seem to be shook, all he wants is cookies, so Carol tells him to steal chocolate from the room, and to get her a bar for herself, because blackmailing children is what’s hot in the streets. But now I’m wondering what is wrong with this kid that he can break into the house of a person that has already threatened to tie him to a tree so the walkers could get him. I don’t know about you, but I’d be staying FAR away from her.

-Glenn formulates a plan to escape, but they’re startled by Aiden, who is apparently still alive, even though Nicholas said he checked him and he was dead. The walkers notice this as well, so Glenn, Noah and Nicholas try to save him while Eugene waits with Tara. It’s right about here that I realize someone isn’t making it back to Alexandria.

-Abe is on a construction site, run by Tobin (the man that told Carol he would teach her how to shoot in the previous episode), and he starts getting lightheaded and it looks like a bout of PTSD. However, he snaps out of it when a group of walkers comes out of the woods, but the lookout, Francine, falls out of her tractor. Tobin wants to leave her there, but Abe swoops in to save the day. It’s funny that Tobin says they can’t rescue Francine when she’s like, ten feet away and they all have guns. Meanwhile, Abe is basically wetting his pants at the chance to kill some shit. However, the rest of the crew aren’t bitches like Tobin and decide to help out.

-Pete stops by Rick’s house with beer, so we can confirm that he’s a drunk now. The two have a really weird conversation in which Pete keeps dropping hints that he knows Rick’s tryna bang his wife, and Rick has to be wondering if he saw the kiss. I still think Pete broke the owl, and then drops, “oh, I hear you lost your wife”, and at this point, I think Rick is just going to bite his throat because he has done it before. All Pete needs to say is, hey, could you not try and bang my wife? Then they have a real awkward handshake, so this fight gotta happen at this point.

-Eugene spends his time chastising an unconscious Tara before gettin’ on his Last Action Hero shit, walking outta the room he was in with her over his shoulder and shooting zombies and I’m dying of laughter at this point. Meanwhile, Glenn and ’em are still tryna save Aiden, whose screams draw more walkers and his boy, Nicholas, runs the fuck off, but not before he says, “you left them, that’s who we are” and Glenn is like, say word? That’s when Aiden tells him the truth about the four people they lost; it was he and Nicholas who panicked, so really, they’re not about that life at all. Glenn stays until the last possible second, but he and Noah have to leave, so we get to watch Aiden get just fuckin’ devoured by walkers, who FINALLY get to eat. We always see them getting killed, it’s good to see them getting thrown a bone (or a horse) every once in a while.

-Francine punches Tobin for even thinking of letting her die, and then Abe assumes control of the group because there is still sunlight, which means there is work to do. Francine is lookin’ at him like, oh really now, and he should consider that, although Rosa won’t be happy. But Abe needs a mission, and now he has it.

-Glenn, Noah and Nicholas try to get out the front, but they should have known that wasn’t gon’ work, and end up getting stuck in the only revolving door left on the planet, where they get surrounded by walkers while I hear the Benny Hill theme playing in my head. This is gon’ end SO BADLY for someone, hopefully Nicholas.

-Tobin goes to Deanna, Reg and Maggie to tell them that Abe should run the construction site and they all seem to agree, but Deanna pushes back a little on Maggie, saying that it’s funny that one of her people does something good and she vouches for them. One, everyone knows Abe should be the leader of that shit and two, what did she think was gon’ happen?

-Carol is making these cookies for Sam and still being an outright asshole to him, but he is still tryna be friends and make small talk. Carol then finds out that it was Sam who broke the owl, and he asks her if he can have a gun; she asks why he needs one and he runs out, and the wheels start turning for Carol, who we all know has been in this situation before: Pete beats Jessie and Sam.

-The three are still stuck in the revolving door, but Eugene rolls up with the rave van to distract the walkers and Glenn comes up with a plan to get out, but Nicholas goes against the plan to try and get himself out, and Noah ends up getting grabbed by the walkers. So, I’m willing to put this up there with the most gruesome deaths of all time in The Walking Dead as the walkers are literally tearing Noah’s face and eyes apart as he is pressed up against the glass, but more disturbing is that Glenn has to watch it and for everything he has seen and done, he is a mess. This was horrifying. Even the second time I watched it, it was horrifying.

-Nicholas runs up to Eugene in the van and tries to hijack it and the two fight before Glenn runs up and punches the dogshit outta Nicholas. They throw him in the van with Tara and drive off, and Eugene asks where Noah is, but he knows what happened. He sees the journal that Noah was given by Reg, and all Noah managed to write was “This is only the beginning”. Oh, it’s the beginning of something alright.

-Carol goes over to Pete’s, where she finds him drunk and asks to speak with either Sam or Jessie, but he says it’s a bad time and slams the door, and all he has done now is awaken Killa Carol. You have fun with that, Pete.

-Gabriel goes to Deanna to tell her that Rick and his crew are dangerous and that they’re gon’ mess everything up, but little does he know that Maggie is listening around the corner. He looks slightly wide-eyed and crazy, and he keeps saying that Satan disguises himself. Deanna says she has a lot to think about before he leaves, but holy shit, I wanted to jump on-screen and fight this dude myself. Gabriel says that the group did some things, like, I don’t know, KILL CANNIBALS. His fuckass self would still be on a rock as walker bait and his church would have eventually got overrun anyway, and let’s not act like Father Bitchass himself didn’t leave his congregation outside of a locked church to get eaten. Sure, Rick and ’em are dangerous and he might have like, 13% of a point. But let’s not act like his hands are clean. He is the worst character in the history of The Walking Dead.

-While Father Bitchass is talking to Deanna, their convo is getting cut with Carol telling Rick her suspicions about Pete, and she tells him that Rick is gon’ have to kill him. I mean, they could have a trial or get some evidence, but hey, that shit gets in the way and we all know he’s guilty, so I’m ridin’ with Killa on this one.

So, it’s gon’ be interesting when Glenn comes back to Deanna without her son, and Nicholas’ fuckass lies on them. How much stock does/will she put into the rantings of Father Bitchass? Where is that little Enid girl who I’m 99% sure has Rick’s blender gun? Will Eugene start punching random mufuckas in the face because he’s a man now? I have no idea, but The Walking Dead has a lot to live up to after what I feel was the best episode of the season and definitely the best since last season’s “The Grove”, which was also episode 14. Two episodes left, let’s get it.